Throwback. This is a story that takes place in a world where wishes can be granted. A sorcerer king (Chris Pine) serves as a gatekeeper for the wish granting, and for safety’s sake, he extracts all the wishes from the … Continue reading You’re a Star – Wish (2023)
Littering and… So this is about a small band of Vermont State Troopers. Their department is on the verge of being shut down, and you can’t blame the people in charge for wanting to 86 the department entirely. All they … Continue reading Cops and Their Shenanigans – Super Troopers (2001)
The bar is made for dancing. Meet Violet (Piper Perabo). She’s an aspiring songwriter who decides to make the leap and move to New York City. It’s an expensive place to live, so to make ends meet, she goes to … Continue reading Jersey Girl – Coyote Ugly (2000)
Literally getting the band back together. So all the Trolls you love are back, but what do you know about their pasts? Before Branch (Justin Timberlake) was the curmudgeon that everybody grew to love, he was actually in a boy … Continue reading Bro Down – Trolls Band Together (2023)
Friend trip. So this is about a trio of buddies (Martin Herlihy, John Higgins, Ben Marshall). Their lives seem to be pulling them in different directions, but when John learns that he may have the key to the fabled treasure … Continue reading You Are My Treasure – Please Don’t Destroy: The Treasure of Foggy Mountain (2023)
They never learn. So spoiler alert for Alien³: it ends with Ripley (Sigourney Weaver) taking her own life to stop the threat that is the Xenomorphs. Weyland-Yutani is a company that can’t take a hint, so 200 years later, they … Continue reading The Joys of Motherhood – Alien: Resurrection (1997)
Let’s get uneven. So this is about the soccer team of American Samoa. They have the dishonor of being the team that suffered the worst blowout in FIFA history, 31-0. To change their luck, they bring in a coach from … Continue reading One Goal – Next Goal Wins (2023)
Back to the well. So you’re probably aware of the 74th and 75th annual Hunger Games, but how much do you know about the 10th? Public interest was waning at the time, but young upstart Coriolanus Snow (Tom Blyth) has … Continue reading Before Katniss – The Hunger Games: The Ballad of Songbirds & Snakes (2023)
Holiday blues. So this is about a history teacher (Paul Giamatti) at a boarding school. Most students go home over the Christmas holiday, but a few stay behind for various reasons. Nobody likes this teacher much, so he gets forced … Continue reading Christmas Break – The Holdovers (2023)
To the courtroom. So this is about a woman (Sandra Hüller) who becomes a suspect when her husband (Samuel Theis) dies under mysterious circumstances. He fell from the top of their isolated chalet, and her blind son (Milo Machado Graner), … Continue reading Suspicions of Murder – Anatomy of a Fall (2023)
Critic for Hire 