Nobody Cares – Allegiant (2016)

The ship has sailed.  So with the third chapter in the Divergent series, our band of rebels has finally made it outside of the walled in city to discover that there is civilization outside.  It looks like there was a man behind the curtain this whole time, so what is to happen next?  … No, really, that wasn’t a rhetorical question.  There is one thing that I am absolutely certain of, and that is that Summit Entertainment is kicking themselves to have gone with the decision to follow suit and split this into two movies when it was only written to be a trilogy.  The YA movie movement has run its course, and audiences were already growing tired of it when we reached Mockingjay Part 2, so you know people really don’t care how these knockoffs are going to wrap up.  There’s nothing left in the tank for this series, and they should have just let this be the finale.

2Will they?  Won’t they?  It doesn’t matter.

The one thing I think this movie would have benefited from is starting this off like a story-based TV show with a “previously, on Divergent”.  I don’t remember any of the details from the first two movies, I just know that there are pretty white faces being oppressed by older evil people, all the while some larger mystery looms just on the horizon.  I don’t remember where all of these different relationships stand, and it would have probably helped my focus on this story.  The one thing that I did distinctly remember is that Miles Teller betrays the group every time, but they always end up letting him back into their clique like idiots.  You would think that the third time would be the charm to make them wise up, but I’ll be damned if this series didn’t go for the trifecta.  It’s almost to the point where there should be a Seinfeld-esque sound effect, with them shaking their heads and saying, “oh, that crafty Miles” at the camera.

1I know the names of two of the above characters and that’s it.

We all stopped caring after the last movie, and this is predictable to the point of being boring.  The first two movies did nothing but hint at some huge revelation that exists just outside of the city walls, and now that we finally get there, you are sure to have a reaction of “… that’s it?”  You can probably identify who the antagonist is simply by looking at the cast list, and there isn’t a single surprise to be found here.  Visually, it’s probably the best looking in the series, but the care train left the station a year ago, and this should have been the end, not another stretched out chapter.

Allegiant (2016) *1/2

– Critic for Hire

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