Imagine Twilight without Vampires and Werewolves – Endless Love (2014)

Young and beautiful white people with problems.  So this is about a love-at-first-sight young couple (Alex Pettyfer, Gabriella Wilde) who can’t get together because the girl’s father (Bruce Greenwood) has made it his personal mission to keep them apart.  When I watched trailers for this a few months back, I was floored by how sappy and melodramatic this appeared to be, so when I actually sat down to watch this, I can’t say that I was surprised at how accurate this movie is advertised to be.  It feels like they are going after the same audience as the CW, and so much of the story plays out like a plot line that you would expect to see on Dawson’s Creek.

White peopleWith the way the posters to this movie looks, I’m surprised this wasn’t written by Nicholas Sparks.

I don’t mind a good romance story when it is done correctly; this review is being written by a guy who gets indescribable amount of enjoyment from watching Titanic and Moulin Rouge, usually multiple times a calendar year.  However, Endless Love is aimed at the lowest common denominator: people who just want to see the leads get together solely because they’re both attractive.  It’s not like they share this great chemistry or anything, they’re both very pretty and very white, and therefore, they belong together.  Even if you are that kind of person who read the previous two sentences and said “hey, that sounds like the movie for my Friday night,” I don’t think this is for you because that romance that you crave is only here on the surface; after the first act, the girl absolutely fades into the background because she isn’t written to have any personality traits other than sheltered and innocent.

Sad womanWhile I may not be able to give you relationship advice, let me tell you, ladies: you can DEFINITELY do better than this movie.

What this movie is really about is the competition between the misfit boy and the father FOR the daughter as the prize.  They keep manufacturing reasons why this couple can’t be together, and when it keeps on happening over and over again, it starts to get repetitive.  In this movie, the only voice of reason is the father, so much so that I was rooting for him just because he was the only one making sense.  Then they have him do something that feels so out of character, and you can’t help but see the strings behind it, because the only reason that it is even here is to help villainize him so as to make it more easy to root for the couple to be together.  Also worthy of mentioning is how white-washed movie this is; this is the type of movie where even the black people are pretty white, and the kids here do such outrageous things such as making an announcement mid-party that every designated couple has thirty minutes to choreograph a spontaneous dance number (I am not making this up).  Even for the intended audience who just wants to see people make moon eyes at each other for 100 minutes, I don’t think it’s going to hit home because it feels so calculated and because all of the teenagers make such poor life decisions.

Endless Love (2014) *1/2

– Critic for Hire

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